Please note that this article was adapted from the following video.
In this article, I refer by “story” to everything you tell to justify your lack of ability to move in a certain direction that is of benefit to you. Or what might justify your lack of ability to take responsibility over certain matters.
Here is a good example of a story you might here from someone: "I am a shy public speaker because when I was a kid my parents did not allow me to go to theater classes and were against my dream of becoming an actor."
While it might be true, this story does help its teller to do something about his problem of being shy.
If you take a couple of minutes to relate to the word as I define it, you might realize that you do tell stories way more often then you realize.
We tell stories because it is relieving… The problem is that, telling stories, is like putting a band aid on a wound without treating it.
The reason it is important for you to be aware of these stories it is because they let you go away with not doing anything about certain situations or improving the quality of your life.
In other words, there is a big chance that the story you are telling is affecting your ability to stay motivated and to take action.
With “self-growth” in mind, you are going to be increasingly careful about how you tell these stories.
- So now I invite you to look at a couple of areas of your life that you are not feeling great about.
For example, if you are unhappy write in a notebook or on a piece of paper whatever you say to yourself and others to justify this unhappiness. If you are not satisfied with a certain situation write how you justify not having done anything about it! Speak freely, say whatever you have in mind and in however way it is most relieving to you. Vent out
- Now take a step back and re-read what you have wrote by being critical and analytical.
- Spot where you are omitting facts or details and spot your innocent lies for example when you say: ”I don’t have time”, “I am not good at”, “I have other priorities”.
In other words: spot where you are being unfair, where you are being too negative or where you are adopting a very narrow perspective.
- Now tell your story differently, making sure you are as positive as you can and focusing on what you can do to start the transformation process.