Have Agreements with Yourself to Improve Your Life

Have Agreements with Yourself to Improve Your Life

Please note that this article was adapted from the following video.

We all have priorities and causes we want to contribute to. We all have ways we want to be. We usually do because we believe that directing our efforts in certain ways makes us happy and fulfills us.

The problem is that we often start contributing to these causes without having a conversation with ourselves to define what our level of contribution is going to be.

As a result, we are often overwhelmed and we don’t get rewarded by our efforts: We feel that we never do enough!

I invite you to ask yourself  in the first place: what is "enough"?

Imagine that as an altruistic and humanist person you help other people in your life because deep inside you believe that doing this will fulfill you and make you happy. You start giving your time and energy to others. And every day you have more opportunities to help others… so you do… because… why wouldn’t you? Little by little you give more of your time and energy and you start getting tired and depleted. You still don’t feel fulfilled, because you don’t feel you have done enough. You think that by giving more of your time and energy you might finally feel that you have done enough. But you still don’t. It is a vicious circle.

Seeking to be good enough without defining what enough is, is like chasing an unachievable dream! It is unfulfilling and it is unrewarding.

Life is all about having agreements with yourself.

There is often no right or wrong, enough, or not enough; should or shouldn’t. It is often a matter of defining what is right for you by having an agreement with yourself before you act. Until you have this conversation with yourself you will jeopardize what you are trying to achieve for yourself by investing these efforts. No matter how positive and beneficial these efforts might seem to you. If you say, this month I will make 10 people happy by helping them and you do. You are more likely to be happier and fulfilled than If you don’t define your contribution, help 100 people, lose all your resources and energy, and still not feel that you have done enough.

Every time you want to dedicate time or energy to a cause, a priority, people or to carry a value, ask yourself the right questions before going into it blindly:

Why will I contribute to this cause? What’s in it for me?

How much energy and time will I be satisfied investing?

In other words, knowing that I can always do more, what would be good enough for me?

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